I have six kids. My husband and I joke that we have yours, mine and someone else’s.
I have had the amazing responsibility of taking on the role of mom, stepmom and adoptive mom.
Regardless of how those children became mine, I have always been transparent that I am not their friend.
I know this is probably not a popular opinion, but as our children grew, I knew that the most important relationship was the parent/child relationship. I knew that my children had plenty of friends and they did not need me as one of them.I had the example of amazing parents. I knew that they were in charge of our family. I never had to wonder if they would take care of me. They were my parents and not my friends. I know that this largely impacted how I raised my children.
I raised two children on my own and took this seriously. When our families blended, I gained a stepdaughter and a stepson and still remained steadfast in the pursuit of being a parent, not a friend.
Now, I am the parent of two little boys again and culture has changed.
Somewhere over the past decade, the trend of being a friend to your kids has become commonplace, and I am not here for it.
Your kids have friends and they come and go. Friendships change due to activities, locations, and circumstances in your life. Parents don’t.
I understand that this is not a popular opinion in our current culture but it is a non-negotiable for me. Children need parents, and they don’t need parents to be their friends.
My oldest is 28 now and we have hit the point where I still worry about him like a child at times, but we talk and share as friends. It is a sweet season of life when you can make that shift.
