I haven’t always been someone who has gotten excited for the holidays and this year, it is extra hard. I have been through a lot this year and am trying to get into the holiday spirit but my heart hurts. I am going through a divorce and with all of the stress associated with that – I am exhausted from trying to be strong.
The holidays, for me, are a time of reflection and gratitude. Sometimes it turns into morbid reflection, though, and gratitude is difficult to acknowledge. Despite having a lot of good things happening to me right now, I still tend to look at the negative. I struggle with mom guilt, specifically, and I wonder, how did I serve my kids this year? How can I be a better mom next year?
We all are doing the best we can, especially during the holidays.
As I have written before, I am a recovering alcoholic, and the holidays are also difficult to navigate because our culture encourages drinking this time of the year. How can I make it through the holidays without drinking? With all of the emotions I feel this year, specifically, drinking to numb my negative feelings would certainly make things easier; however, drinking would ultimately make things worse because of how out of control my drinking gets.
With the holidays already upon us, I am seeking intensive therapy to help me process my emotions. Everyone needs someone to talk to, especially because society expects us to be happy during this time. Anything we can do for self-care and to treat ourselves during this season, do it!
Give yourself grace.
You don’t have to be the happiest you’ve ever been to celebrate the holidays. One step at a time, one day at a time. Maybe put up the tree, and call that a win. Or don’t put up the tree this year. Do what you can to make it through and don’t beat yourself up if everyone on social media has the perfect holiday season.
We will get through this – 2024, here we come!
